Prepare your pockets – a source close to the inner circle of politics has revealed a secret plan to raise the at-pump cost of petrol to $4 a litre by Christmas.
Our whistleblower, who has asked not to be named for fear of reprisals, works closely within the Labour party and decided to speak out today after the Prime Minister inferred New Zealander’s complaints about the rising costs were unjustified and unreasonable.
Jacinda Ardern asserted this morning on Breakfast that “the increases they [low income families receiving family tax credits] are getting will far outstrip fuel prices” claiming that the average family was $75 better off a week.
“In reality, this isn’t true” argues our source. “It’s misleading to use the word ‘average’ because it’s not a true representation of the sample group. It’s just quick maths.”
“Most families who receive FTC and WFF [Family Tax Credits and Working For Families] actually saw an increase of between $15 and $40 which is nowhere near the $75 the Prime Minister tries to convince us most families are getting.”
“What little increase they get is already being eaten up by increased food and living costs, and it doesn’t take into consideration people who don’t get the tax credits at all but are still on low incomes and struggling.”
We then turned to the issue at hand, and the implications are both shocking and deeply concerning.
It seem there is a panel of influential A-listers and top politicians, the identities of which are top-secret, who are planning to push forward and increase the proposed ACC levy from 1.9c to 5c a litre, as well as bumping up the regional and local authority levies around the country.
This would also raise the GST cost, the ‘tax on tax’, bringing the cost up even further.
The increases would be delivered in small equal amounts steadily over the next few months.
“I saw a brief of the proposal which was left in a bathroom and thought at first it must be a prank, but after I left I got to thinking and wanted to take another look. But it was gone when I returned, even though it had only been a few minutes.”
“The names of the panel were redacted, but I have seen John Key in the building a few times recently, I wonder if he’s involved? He’s in the business of making money, after all.”
“All it said about them was that they were influential New Zealanders and included current and previous politicians.”
“I’ve had enough. I can’t make excuses for the increases any longer if they are going to put it up that high.”
A new Facebook group formed to protest the increases, No more petrol hikes! Boycott Z’s come on New Zealand! [sic] has inspired a great deal of discussion, with reports and images of the high prices flooding in from around the country.
One member shared screeenshot taken from another group, Mancave, where a poster in that group revealed prices in Waiheke Island had gone over the $2/ltr mark for diesel, while 91 was $2.76 – far higher than most other parts of the country, where prices are currently sitting anywhere between $2.40 and $2.50, with Canterbury, Southland and some parts of the Central North Island reportedly being hit the hardest.
If the reports are accurate, we ain’t seen nothing yet.