Date Archives September 2018

Plastic bag thefts on the rise from supermarkets as ban looms

With the hotly debated plastic bag ban fast approaching, Countdown supermarkets across New Zealand are reporting a sharp rise in thefts at the checkouts. This week, the supermarket giant announced their plans to implement a mass cull of the shopping staple within a fortnight, across sixty-seven stores, with the Final Countdown ending on October 8. All South Island branches as well as a handful in the North Island will no longer supply plastic bags after this date. However, immediately after the announcement went live, supermarket staff across many branches began… Read More

1080 opponents to DoC: children aren’t pests!

In the wake of the story this afternoon that a plane has dropped an unknown substance on a school, making many children ill, some 1080 opponents are convinced there was a more sinister agenda afoot. Members of the anti-1080 group 1080 eyewitness have this afternoon been speculating that the cause of the children’s illness was a deliberate attack and that the substance may have contained 1080 poison. “Its started, in the killing fields of nz..only incidents like these will make govt wake up” lamented one member. “Scunitise [sic] their lies…. Read More

Fears possums may be immune to 1080, developing mutations

Fears are emerging that 1080 poison is not only ineffective against possums, but may in fact be causing mutations. Hunting enthusiast and keen bushman Don Bilivmi has been travelling the country, monitoring possum behaviour and populations following 1080 drops. “The pro-poisoners keep claiming that 1080 reduces possum populations where they drop but you can’t trust their data, so I’ve been conducting my own research.” explains Mr Bilivmi. “Not only are they not actually dying, but they appear to be becoming more aggressive, growing larger, and their features are changing.” he… Read More

Stefan Molyneux reacts to refugee increase: “I told you so”

Stefan Molyneux has allegedly weighed in on PM Jacinda Ardern’s announcement this afternoon that New Zealand will increase its refugee quota from 1000 people per year to 1500 by 2020. In a screenshot provided to us this afternoon by a reader, Stefan Molyneux appears to claim in a tweet, “New Zealand PM has announced they will take an extra 500 refugees a year. I told you so. Enjoy your #ShairaLaw.” In a final jibe, perhaps in reference to his and comrade Lauren Southern’s unsuccessful attempts to speak in New Zealand… Read More

Countdown shelf stackers putting long life milk to the test

How much of a life does long life milk really have? Shelf stackers at Countdown Moorehouse Ave have been defying the best before dates on Meadow Fresh long life milk. The discrepancy was first noticed at the end of July by Koku Ryu, who posted on the Countdown facebook page: “Come on guys, this milk expired almost a month ago for some of it.” The admin for the supermarket’s page responded asking which branch it was so that the store manager could be advised and the issue rectified, and Mr… Read More

Donald Trump is waging war against plagiarism and wants to make it a capital offense

Donald Trump has today declared a new war, this time against plagiarism. In a recent tweet, Trump expresses outrage at the apparent hijacking of a book his son, Donald Trump Jr., has been attempting in vain to have published. “…an almost identical book to be released, but not by my son! Plagiarists should be hung!” declares the tweet. Trump ends the mini-rant by asserting he intends to make the “travesty” a capital offense, before signing off with his trademark #MAGA. Trump’s sudden opposition to plagiarism may strike some as ironic,… Read More